i suck at blogging.
i forget about this way too often.
but i promise… i will try and update soon.
just quickly though, damon and i have been discussing lou… tara, and shane.
so i will do my best to give you an update within the next week or so.
- love flo.
i find it quite funny sometimes when i say something about someone or whatever… and i swear a day or two later, it happens or they appear out of nowhere.
you know when you’re discussing how you used to talk to so and so, and then they stopped talking to you.
and then the following week, you get a random text or phone call from that same person?
yeah, well that kind of shit happens to me all the time.
it’s really freaking me out.
i mentioned in my last entry that, tara, was planning to return to nyc with her baby but had hesitated because of the awkwardness that would be between the two of us.
well, i went home after work yesterday and guess who was at door?
you guessed it.
she even brought her son; i had to admit he was absolutely gorgeous.
flo: uh, hi louise?
tara: it’s tara, hi florence.
flo: this is a surprise… tara.
tara: i’m sorry to just turn up like this – do you have a min?
what was i supposed to do?
turn away the woman and her baby?
well yes, i could have – but i’m not an asshole.
flo: sure, but i uh, have to be somewhere in a while so…
tara: it’s ok, i won’t be too long. i just wanted a chance to explain everything.
honestly, what was there to explain?
i wasn’t too keen on hearing that shane was the father of your baby; i already gathered that he would most likely be.
seeing the baby face to face was like looking at shane’s baby album.
there were so many similarities between shane and this… gorgeous kid.
tara: this is my little boy. his name is tyler.
flo: hi tyler.
tara: he’s shane’s son.
flo: of course he is. he looks just like him.
tara: i wanted to tell you face to face.
flo: why? it’s not like shane and i were together when you… you know.
tara: i felt bad.
flo: you felt bad? wow, i’m a little shocked to hear that.
tara: look, i know you hate me and that’s fine – i’ve changed. having tyler has made me a different person.
flo: that’s great to hear, but i don’t really–
tara: care? i know.
flo: is this going to make you feel better at night knowing that you finally came and told me?
tara: you know you’re never going to change. you’re going to be a selfish and rude… person, all your life.
flo: i’m not the one who accused someone else of stealing their sister’s… boyfriend, nor am i the one who went and got pregnant to their, friend’s ex… and then ran off to another country because they were ashamed.
tara: i wasn’t ashamed.
flo: what would you call it then? why did you leave?
tara: i just thought it was best.
flo: well i think it’s best you leave now.
tara: i’m sorry. look, i just wanted to ask if you had spoken to shane at all. i haven’t heard from him since i went back to canada.
flo: so he doesn’t know tyler’s his son? wait wait… so there’s a chance that tyler isn’t even his.
tara: that’s none of your business.
i never saw that coming.
so while she’s certain that shane was the father, there was a potential that he wasn’t.
not that i cared; i was more concerned for the kid.
wow.
she left without giving any more details.
and i quickly texted madz and keeley about her visit.
they weren’t surprised either.
so speaking of fathers and kids and all that stuff, i recently worked up the courage to ask my mom about my real father and where he would be.
like most women who go through bad relationships – she had tried for years to forget everything about him.
but she remembered his name at least.
so, with my new found interest in facebook, i searched for him.
it wasn’t exactly the easiest find but i did narrow it down with the help of a few of my mom’s friends.
so i think i found him.
i haven’t exactly struck a conversation with him just yet – i’m heading down to bristol to see mom and i want to ask her if its him before i go and make a fool of myself telling some stranger that i might be his daughter.
if he is my father, what will i do with that information?
no idea.
but i’ll let you know when i figure that out.
- love flo.
well kids, i’ve decided to start blogging again.
i’ve de-activated my twitter account though; i wasn’t such a huge fan of it.
i still haven’t decided on whether i will stay here or move sites, but for the time being i’ll stay here.
go with what you know right?
so it’s been a while since i last blogged.
about 7 months to be exact.
and a lot has happened.
so while i do my best to update you on what’s new, don’t expect too much.
where do i begin…
angelo and madz are engaged.
it happened at christmas, angelo’s family were in town and he thought it would be the perfect time to propose.
of course it was an absolute surprise to madz, but none the less she was thrilled.
keeley and i are so happy for her – this means a trip to italy for us.
but of course that’s not the main reason we’re happy.
it’s just a bonus.
charlie and keeley are still together.
charlie’s ex girlfriend was arrested for breaking an entering a few times at their place.
so they ended up moving to an apartment in sutton place, which is about a 15 min walk from my apartment.
they were a lot happier there, no dramas since.
jared and lina both decided to move to the uk for a couple of years – working and a little more travelling around europe.
i envied them – i wish i travelled more, but i was happy with where my life was at right now and i didn’t want to give it up.
louise was no longer louise; she’d started using her middle name tara instead.
no one could really understand why but my assumption was she just wanted tl start fresh.
speaking of louise… well tara, she gave birth to a baby boy.
she’d sent madz and keeley a photo, but asked that they not show me.
of course, they were my best friends and they showed me anyway.
i always had a feeling that shane was the father.
but since he skipped town we never found out.
the picture couldn’t prove it either, it was just too hard to tell.
was planning to return to nyc in the summer but according to the girls, she was re-considering because of me.
but i was fine with it, i was over the whole thing.
i couldn’t care to be honest.
i was with damon and i was happy.
i was a little worried though, my relationship with him was going great, but there is always a doubt he would up and leave like he did many times before.
he reassure me frequently that it wasn’t going to happen.
he gave me a key to his apartment as proof he wasn’t going to leave.
i’m not sure how that worked but i took his word for it.
the stripper twin both found jobs that didn’t require them to take their clothes off.
we saw them every now and they both ended up moving to florida so it was hard to see them.
we all stayed in touch via email and social media.
yes… i joined facebook.
i don’t really go on that often, i’m sure it’s not that difficult to use but i just really haven’t had the time to sit there and suss it out.
twitter was simple and easy to use but i got bored of it.
it’s been a long 7 months or so, and i’ve been keeping myself busy with damon, the girls, work and travelling back to bristol a few times to see my mom.
i’m looking forward to summer and i wish it would get here faster, but until then i’m going to have to freeze my ass off.
i’m sure you’re dying to know what else has been happening but chill out a little.
let me get into the swing of things and i will update as often as i can.
if you’re lucky i may have an update for you tomorrow.
- love flo.
